i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
