you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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