ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
