whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
it was like eating out sand paper
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
