what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
where am i from again
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
