just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Randomize
