have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Randomize