Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
It's blow job season.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
