So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
