Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
