They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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