Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
