I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Randomize
