Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
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