i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
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