He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
How many fucks given?
0.12846
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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