i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
