After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Randomize
