I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
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