What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
