I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
im holly from the hills drunk
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Randomize
