yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
