What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
Houston, we have a blender
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Randomize
