So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Randomize
