The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
