There is no way he is gay with that hair.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
