After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
