Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
