I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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