Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
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