I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
