Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Randomize