You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
