That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
