i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
