I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Randomize
