Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize
