Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
