I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Be still, my beating vagina.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
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