why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
