how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
