Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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