I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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