I'm pants shitting drunk right now
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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