just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
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