so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize