I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
