he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
