Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
