He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
