who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize